Welcome back to the Retirement Home. The mood is sombre in the home having suffered relegation from Division 1. Maybe that is the threshold for this team of old timers? With money still a huge issue, is there any real chance of taking this lot any further? Maybe I should walk away now…
This is not your standard update post. You might have noticed it is December so this will be my last post of the year. Let me explain…
Hello! Bonjour! Areeeeet. Welcome to the final update of season 6 here in Mulhouse, where this set of no hopers have grown to have some hope even if many of them don’t want to be here. We’ve got a multitude of quarter finals to come and we’re well placed to finally win the league. I would enjoy that.
If we’re on the up, Monaco are definitely on the slide. That’s where we head next, looking to avoid the distraction of the casino to take three points.
In 1997 Sean Dundee was in the midst of quite possibly the second most successful spell of his career at Karlsruher SC and is a generally sound purchase in the not so well scouted (by CM) German league. He was having such a good spell that the guys over at Ubi Soft hoped he would sponsor their DOS football game World Club Football…and he said yes!
In 1998, the bizarre experiment of joint managers at Liverpool saw Dundee arrive in a £2m deal, failing to break into the side and making a paltry 3 league appearances before being shipped back to Germany at a loss. He arrived back at Karlsruher in 2006 via Stuttgart and Austria Wien and 1 Germany B cap. After leaving Karlsruher again he scored one goal over the next four years before retiring. He briefly came back to play in Step 8 of the German league system at an amateur level.
Welcome back to the latest episode of Turnips on Tour! Last time out we’d managed to bag trophies number two and three and remained on top of La Liga (yet to taste defeat) despite the relentless train that is Real Madrid chasing us down. We’ve got a Copa del Ray semi-final on the horizon and a quarter-final with Juventus to contend with. The Sonny and the B-Sharps are into the quarters of the Cup Winners Cup and can look forward to Lazio over two legs; they also remain top of the Segunda and if any of that comes off, I’m staking a claim for their trophies! Here’s a reminder of our position in La Liga.
We have 5 La Liga games coming up 4 of which are against top 10 opposition, a defining period in our chase for a second La Liga title. Rayo Vallecano and Deportivo are dispatched 4-1. We come up against a surprisingly lowly Atletico and our iron Ljung rescues us with two exquisite free kicks. Jens will be a miss having restored himself into the defensive midfield role.
Next up its 2nd vs 1st as we take a trip to Sevilla to face off with Real Betis…again! The result is an absolute classic. It’s end-to-end stuff, eye for an eye. We almost have it in the bag, but Betis lay siege to our goal with 10 shots in the last 10 minutes and we finally crack.
5th placed Real Sociedad push us all the way, but we edge them out 5-3. Whilst its great to keep the Swedelona win machine on the road, the number of goals we’ve been conceding of late is a real worry. Back to European action next as we take on Juventus in our 1st leg. If we get through, it will just get harder.
We make a perfect start with top scorer and last seasons final hero Karlsson getting off the mark. Montero powers in a header less than 10 minutes later to balance things up. The son of man gets us in-front, only for that miserable Conte to equalise. But mmm-bop it’s so swede and we take a 1 goal lead into the second leg. Jansson will miss the away game thanks to a stubbed toe.
Bottom placed Albacete cause us some problems, but we eventually put 5 past them and get away with the points. Another injury to a defender is a cause for concern with our hunt for maximum trophies.
We struggle past Tenerife and our entire first 11 gets called up to the Sweden squad.
The return leg in Turin arrives and it is a nervy affair. We get ourselves up 5-3 on aggregate until Juventus snatch one back and keep us pinned back for the remainder of the game. We see it out and make it to the semi-finals!
Our joy is short lived as we are drawn to play Real Madrid for the 5th and 6th times of the season. If we make it there, we can make it anywhere…hopefully Alfonso is injured again.
The B-Sharps make it past Lazio and are into the Cup Winners Cup semi-finals. They draw Celtic which leaves Real Betis vs. Aston Villa the other tie. An all-Spanish final?
A dreary draw with Valladolid follows. The new the B-Sharps will be without De La Pena for 10 months thanks to a broken pelvis; not good for the Cup Winners Cup chances. Our first of 3 games against Real Madrid in the next two weeks come up. We dominate and really should have more than a 3-0 lead. Madrid come back which will make the 2nd leg a nervy affair, but we’ll take it!
Next up it’s the first leg of our Copa del Ray semi-final and it is a sweeeeeede affair as we cruise to a comfortable 3-0 victory, geeet up sson!
The Champions League 2nd leg el classico arrives and my nerves are shredded. Karlsson settles them inside 60 seconds by extending our lead! Son of man gets us another one as Asper defies Alfonso so many times we gets subbed off. Seedorf makes it a tense finish but mmmbop its great!
We avoid a Man Utd final, but I’m not sure that’s so good as they’re in terrible form after falling out the FA Cup to Notts Forest.
Meanwhile the B-Sharps progress where they’ll play Real Betis in the Cup Winners Cup final.
Not quite boom, but BOOOOOOOOOM! As ever, the players struggle to pick themselves up for weaker opposition, we flow through the motions for a 0-0 and we’re into the Copa del Ray final. Ernstsson finally gets a Sweden call up!
Back to La Liga for a good while and the derby throws up a simple 2-0 victory, quickly followed up by a big lesson from the son of man for Sevilla. We just need to be careful we don’t burn out.
Our form is such that, despite Johansson being a complete turnip, we win over 90 minutes with just 10 men. Superb. A 12-point lead with 15 points left available, one more win should secure the La Liga title.
We are an absolute roasted turnip, on fire sson! Celta are brushed aside, and deja vu, Prytz completes the blitz. Real Madrid win so we need another win to secure the title.
We eke out a poor draw with Zaragoza, but Real also draw and that is it! Trophy number 4 in the bag!
We lose our invincible status in a poor poor 2-0 home defeat to Valencia. The performance was woeful and it worries me ahead of Milan. I quickly forget about it as the B-Sharps demolish Real Betis 5-0 to lift the Cup Winners Cup…
This must be a CM9798 first, surely. Next up is our Champions League final vs. Milan for which we are now off the boil and poorly prepared. Yessssssssssssssssssssssssss! Oh my Karlsson is the Champions League hero again! Trophy number 5 in the bag!
Next up Hercules before the Copa del Ray final vs. Real Betis. Kihlberg will miss out after getting a foot injury leaving him side-lined for 2 weeks. We sign off the La Liga campaign with an easy victory.
All that’s left is the Copa del Sunshine, a massive game for our turnips against Real Betis. If the B-Sharps can do it then hopefully so can we! The big day arrives, and we are at home for the final. It’s an insufferably tense game of few chances. The game goes to extra time but it all ends in turnip tears. We miss out on the perfect season and trophy number 6.
And with that the curtain closes on an unbelievable season but leaves us with a gap in our trophy cabinet to fill next season. We’ll also tussle in the European Super Cup in an all Barcelona affair. There is one player who has transformed this season, Patrick Karlsson.
And now for the vital statistics. Some of the average ratings have been tremendous.
Meanwhile, as well as Karlsson, Manson has had another terrific season. St Niclas Svensson has had an injury interrupted season preventing him from progressing. And we’re finally making progress with Ljung’s best position.
Kihlberg has also made more inroads in the centre of our formation.
I hope you have enjoyed the thrill of the ride, I’m not sure how we will measure the success of next season but securing the Copa del Ray is my no.1 target. We’ll have the shot at 6 trophies all over again. See you next time!
Here’s Andrew to brighten up your Monday with a look at where the current Bundesliga Managers can be found in CM9798
Dave’s annual review of the current Premier League Managers in CM9798 has proved to be so interesting over the years I’ve decided to see if the same can be said for the current stock of Bundesliga Managers. There are currently a few caretaker situations so this may well move, but let’s take a look!
Borussia Monchengladbach – Marco Rose
Current ‘Gladbach manager Marco Rose is actually in the game plying his trade at VfB Leipzig and impressively has not been ‘scouted’ with a batch of 9’s and 10’s throughout. A distinctly average left sided player.
RB Leipzig – Julian Nagelsmann
As you can imagine, at 10yrs old in 1997, Julian Nagelsmann is nowhere near old enough to have been in the database, but more likely to have been sat back like us all wondering why all the German players were rated so shite. So here instead is RB Leipzig’s goalkeeping coach Frederik Gößling just a youngster starting out at Armenia Bielefeld.
Borussia Dortmund – Lucien Favre
Sadly, Swiss Lucien is not in the CM9798 database. He was at the time managing a small Swiss side Yverdon-Sport FC. His assistant Otto Addo should have been in the database plying his trade for Hannover; however, he has been missed by CM9798’s scouts. So we have Director of Football, Michael Zorc.
Schalke 04 – David Wagner
And here he is, the glue tying this to the Premier League Managers review of previous years, David Wagner. A bang below-average forward at Gutersloh that never amounts to much in any save I’ve ever seen. Looking at the stats, I’m worried Schalke will go the same way as Huddersfield…
SC Freiberg – Christian Streich
Christian Streich was in-between dreams in 1997. He was on his way to gaining some coaching experience as the U19’s coach and now finds himself in his 8th season in charge. None of his coaching staff, scouts or the directors are in the database either. It’s a wonder they are doing so well.
Bayer Leverkusen – Peter Bosz
In 1997 Japan was an attractive proposition for faded and jaded European has-beens. Step up Peter Bosz. Bosz has found his way to Leverkusen following poor spells at Ajax and Borussia Dortmund via Maccabi Tel Aviv. That 19 for positioning has probably helped explain his somewhat nomadic managerial career in interviews since 2016.
Bayern Munich – Hans-Dieter Flick (Caretaker)
As I write, Hans-Dieter Flick is not in either the player or manager databases. In 1997 he was player-manager in non-league at Victoria Bammental. With the poor scouting of the German league it is no surprise to find him excluded. So please instead enjoy Sporting Director Hasan Salihamidzic a youthful Bosnian forward (who was actually a full-back a lot of his career) starting out at Hamburg who went on to play for Bayern, Juventus and VfL Wolfsburg.
Hoffenheim – Alfred Schreuder
Alfred Schreuder was plying his trade in his native Holland back in 1997 for NAC. He couldn’t tackle, he couldn’t head the ball, but in true Dutch fashion that didn’t matter as he was technically gifted, could pass the ball and was fairly creative. Hoffenheim will be hoping this shines through eventually as he looks to live up to what his predecessor Julian Nagelsmann brought to the table so recently.
VfL Wolfsburg – Oliver Glasner
In 1997 Oliver Glasner was playing for SV Ried in Austria and was not in the DB. Same goes for his assistants. Many of the Austrian players don’t load anyway unless you link the nation to a playable league. As ever, here is Sporting Director Jorg Schmadtke who was an ageing ‘keeper at Bayer Leverkusen at the time as a third-choice backup. Jorg’s son Nils is a scout for 1. FC Koln.
Union Berlin – Urs Fischer
Urs was plying his trade in Switzerland at FC Zurich and as a non-playable league was most likely excluded due to lack of profile and a miserly 4 caps. His coaching team are also lacking from the databse so here instead is one of his scouts, Stefan Studer of Hansa Rostock. I’m not sure his employers would be happy to see these stats and whether they are translatable to future success. They do say however, “those that can’t, scout”.
Eintracht Frankfurt – Adolf ‘Adi’ Hutter
An unfortunately named Austrian, Adolf Hutter was scurrying away as a mediocre left midfielder in 1997 for SV Salzburg. He actually never loads in the game unless you attach Austria to one of the playable leagues. I’ve always found the scouting of players that will never load quizzical. He did play in the UEFA Cup Final with Salzburg prior to this game, but he musn’t have made an impression as a 22 year old.
FC Augsburg – Martin Schmidt
Another below the radar Swiss player back in 1997. A career that didn’t amount to much is why he’s missing here (and probably his backroom team too). So here is his goalkeeping coach Zdenko Miletic of Armenia Bielefeld. Croat Zdenko went on to play over 100 games for Augsburg which probably explains his untouchable position on the coaching staff.
SV Mainz 05 – Achim Beierlorzer
Achim Beierlorzer was at non-league SC Schwaback in 1997 and is likely the reason for his omission. We can present his goalkeeping coach Stephan Kuhnert who in 1997 was at Mainz with a 30 year old Jurgen Klopp. Although not in here, Torsten Lieberknecht from the same Mainz side also went into management and is currently at Liga side MSV Duisburg.
Werder Bremen – Florian Kohfeldt
Florian Kohfeldt was never a professional football player. But here is his Youth Team Manager, Thomas Wolter playing for the very same team Werder Bremen. Thomas spent his entire career at Bremen playing 312 games. That one cap would be his only cap. He just didn’t have enough 10’s.
Hertha Berlin – Jurgen Klinsmann
No introductions required. A man who had just helped to break English hearts the 12 months prior to 1997. Here he is playing for Tottenham in what would be an extremely successful spell from a goals perspective and saving Tottenham from relegation after which he would retire and the rest is history. The Premier League is calling Jurgen.
Fortuna Dusseldorf – Friedhelm Funkel
SLAM DUNK THE FUNKEL! Friedhelm Funkel was the manager at MSV Duisburg in 1997 and it was his third management job having started at VfR Neuss in 1989. 30 years later and still going strong.
Paderborn – Steffan Baumgart
Back in 1997 Steffen Baumgart was striking away at Hansa Rostock in one of the better spells of his career. He would go on to deliver poor results at club after club. I’ve never took a chance on him in a save before but the time may come.
FC Koln (Cologne) – Markus Gisdol
Markus Gisdol was starting out, managing TSG Salach in 1997 and spent many seasons managing in lower league Germany which explains the exclusion from the database. He would get a break with Hoffenheim in 2013. Another manager still going strong. But with nothing to show, here is his goalkeeping coach Andreas Menger, described on Wikipedia as a ‘netminder’…a lot of average goalkeepers seem to be able to find work in Germany as coaches.
You can follow Andrew on Twitter @kingoftherooks
Hello and welcome to the end of season 4 here at the Retirement Home. Things have rarely been bleaker for me as a manager. We’ve scored 15 goals in 30 games as our veterans have ran out of legs. It’s fair to say we’re finding a second season at First Division level extremely tough and we need to make up 9, realistically 10, points in 16 games to stay up.
Hello! Welcome back to the Mulhouse project, where we’re about to enter the crucial middle section of season 6. Everything is actually quite close to come up Mulhouse. We’re top of the table and still in every cup we entered. There’s still 23 long games to go though, annoyingly.
